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Thursday, April 29, 2010

so mod.

i love modcloth.
it's reminiscent of anthropologie.

and i love that look.
that feel.
it's just so womanly.

now, as unrealistic as it is for me to come to work dressed like a 1950's homemaker... or slightly hippy-ish,
it doesn't mean i can't love it!

modcloth is a cheaper version of anthro.
and maybe not as grown-up.
but i like it.

and speaking of like...

check out Design Sponge today.
run.  don't walk.  because it's awesome.

you want to talk about a bright yellow sofa makeover from shana and john at junk2funk?


they took this:

and made it into this:


love it.
and i have to say... i've had my eye on a couch similar to this at a local auction house for a few weeks now.
am i capable?
should i go?

they have auctions every saturday at 6pm.

me likey very much.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

oh henry.

i am in love with henry road.  right now through sunday they are having a sale - 40% off their entire website. 

i love this site.
and if i could afford this chair, it would be mine, mine, mine.

check out these lights... O.M.G.  i'm so in love today.
unfortunately for me these are only sold in store.
fortunately for those of you in LA, you can go to the store and purchase one.

{cue envy}

these fabulous chairs are on sale $700 (down from $1400) -- then throw the additional 40% off... wow.  that is seriously no joke.  i {heart} them.

Tuesday, April 27, 2010


tonight i had the kids to myself again.



night of champions.

one of the characters in ethan's book o' choice was named "zippleback."

without blinking an eye he corrected me and said, "nippleback."  *teeheeheeheeheeeee*

i didn't teeheehee.  and i don't know why i was shocked he said it.  i mean, let's not forget when he was 4 we got into a conversation with my sister and brother-in-law about favorite parts of the chicken to eat and ethan chimed in with "i love their nipples."

what is wrong with my son?

since he was 6 months old i can remember him playing with his tiny baby nipples.

and now he is a nipple freak.  

lawd help his future wife.  {and sorry to her too.}  this little freak was born this way i SWEAR.


what do you do when someone you love dearly decides to tell you he/she is definitely an atheist?

and by "love dearly" i mean...
someone you bore three children to.

i kind of want to vomit.

Monday, April 26, 2010

i can do iiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

I can do it.
I can be a mom to three kids out in public just fine.
No added stress. Or sweat.
Or yells.
One day?

Why does it seem like every five seconds when I’m out running errands with my babes I find myself calling one of them by their full name? And then I feel like everyone and their mother is looking at me.

I literally freak out when I lose sight of them for a split second. Seriously freak out. It is a rule in my house that if I can’t see you… it’s a BAAAAAAAAAAAD thing. Without traumatizing my kids I’ve tried to explain the importance of staying near their mama when out and about. {It can all happen so fast, you know.} It is, without a doubt, my biggest fear in life. Of course, they are carefree. Naive.  Young.

They do a really good job of staying close most of the time, but it just takes a split second.

{Kind of like when I had a gnat fly into my eye when driving and I plowed into the guy in front of me. It just took a split second. The insurance company said they get a lot of calls like that, but usually it’s from people sneezing. That also takes a split second.}

Yes, I can see that this is going to be a big problem as they get older. And I am really afraid of letting go. But right now I don’t have to and I chose to be protective. I don’t think there is something called being too protective. But I still worry. I worry about my kids 24-7. Mainly because I know I am not perfect. Mistakes happen. Focus can shift to something else in a store and in a blink of an eye, suddenly my kids are three aisles down. I am not perfect. And this is why I know misfortunes can happen.

Without treating this like I did the whole tightrope walking on the deck rail mentality, how do I put across my concerns without permanently damaging them?!

I just worry about failing them and at the same time I worry about being so controlling.

Trickiest job in the world with the most at risk every single minute. It’s a scary thought!

It is a shame there’s no legal certification you get when you pop out a kid. Nobody checks you at the door of the hospital before releasing you with your newborn. They send you naively on your way. Happily carrying a brightly cheeked little cherub home to snug on.  Nice in theory, frightening in longevity and depth of responsibility.  Well worth it all, no doubt.  But if you want to do it right, you constantly question your actions.  At least I hope. 

Thursday, April 22, 2010

silly peas.

sometimes life is so sweet.
i'm trying to appreciate all the little things a little more.

a better shot of emma wizzing down the street on her bike.
i felt i owed this to her since she has worked so hard in a very independent way, at learning to ride her bike.


the other night chris went off to school and i was left at home with a bunch of silly peas.
i mean... silly.
these peas... well... they made me green with envy that i wasn't living in their moment as a 6 year old.
i really love my babes.

i wish i liked to take funny face pictures of myself.
but alas, i don't... so my kids make up for it.
i don't know why, but they love it more than dessert.
they could do it for hours.
and they almost did.

you should know...

none of these were prompted by me.
none of these were really planned.
all of these were begged for.
all of these were taken amongst much laughter.

my sister described emma's eyes when she was born as giant blueberry eyeballs.
it must be said, they are giant.  or maybe that's obvious.
but they are also slowly transforming from the middle out to green.
my baby is missing her baby blues.
which is why she loves to wear blue.
it makes the blue {that is left} a little more... SHAZAM!

i love this kid.
or should i say, monkey?
but what the hell kind of face is this?
he was quite pleased.

all three were sitting on my lap in this one.
1.  it was not comfortable.
2. i was painfully leaning back across the arm of my wooden adirondack just to get them all in the shot.
{that's called mommy love}
3. it was shortly after this moment that sophie plopped on my lap, and hence, my phone, taking a great shot of her booky - cue laughter.

Madonna?  Pshhhhawwww.
my babes can strike a pose like it's their J-O-B.

don't even ask.
i mean, obviously it had to do with stanky armpits.
but why would my 7 year old attempt {and succeed} at licking his armpits?
{especially since he's the only one that regularly stanks up his shirts?}

{no words needed}

i have to tell you about this last picture...
my boy laid out his clothes {as we do each and every night} for school...
check out the socks.
why have i never thought of that?
he felt brilliantly successful at his task that night.
i kind of agree.
why would anyone lay them out in a ball?

Wednesday, April 21, 2010


that's right.
i said... nonfailure.
i didn't give up, and neither did the kids.
i've got 2/3 of my crew up on two wheels. 

i feel pretty awesome.

doesn't she look like a pro?
she was the first to really want to do this.
she never gave up.
always put her all into it.
and SHE was the motivational force that got her big brother
up on two wheels.

he didn't think he would ever learn.
and i didn't either.
{he definitely HAS given up on learning to tie his shoes.  which is why his little sister does it for him}
but he's out there.
loud and proud.
doing "tricks".
tricks involve lifting his feet off the pedals...
for a split second.

but this is the exact reason why i don't want him giving up on tackle football.
i'm not saying i want him to play now through high school.
but i am saying i want him to conquer his humungous fear of getting hurt.
it has seriously limited his playfullness.
and i'm not saying that's due to his mother yelling at him constantly to not do things because...

... you could break your face...
... you could fall off the deck and break your neck...
... you could get your foot cut off...
... etc...
... etc...
... etc...

i might be dramatic.
but when kids are trying to get up on a deck rail to play "tightwire"...
um, yeah...
my instincts kick in..
{and they are slighty dramatic for emphasis}

but that's ok.
because it's all in the name of love.

so i don't plan on forcing him to play ball this season.
but i am heavily encouraging him so that he can feel the euphoria that exists in...
conquering your fear.

he got a little taste of that on his bike.
and he liked it.
wish me luck.
and don't discourage me.
or him.
because we are on a path to discovering our full capabilities in life.

both of us.

Monday, April 19, 2010


Middle Seat: “Hello. hellOOOO. Hellloooo. HELLO. EMMAAAAAAAAAAAA. Are you there? “

Back Seat: “Oh, Hello, I didn’t know you were talking to me. “

Middle Seat: “Emma, do you have your phone? “

Back Seat: “I left it at home so I’m using my credit card to talk to you. “

Middle Seat: “That is ridiculous. BYE. “

OMG.  Sophie slays me.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

vision. equals. nada.

blog fog.  

that's what i'm living through.   i'm focusing so hard that i've lost my vision.  it's so defeating!

i'm sure this in great deal to the chaos that exists in my life right now.  poor emma has a massively painful ear infection that landed us in a doc-in-a-box last night.  ethan had football tonight.  we have sophie's party we're still trying to pull together.  and to top it all off, i'm working all sorts of strange flextime hours for the next few weeks.  my mind is wacked OUT.  oh, and to top THAT off... chris is out of pocket every night this week with loads of school work to get done.  

this jank is CRAZY!


so it's the little things in life that ultimately make us happy... a phone call, a note in a lunchbox, a child's great day at school.  or the occasional potty humor to make your kids belly laugh like they did when they were infants and all you did was make a wacky sound.  i may or may not have done that tonight.  i ran out of funny things to say {and i hate to brag, but i was sort of on a roll with my chillens.} -- so i whipped out one last funny "Poopy Pants" and got the laughs of a lifetime.  

and it was so worth it. 

today i gave myself permission to use potty humor.
{and it was awesome}

Saturday, April 10, 2010

boys and girls. people of all ages.

if the circus gets any better, i know where i'll be retiring.

i think we paid our dues.  i mean, three kids four and under.  we kind of paid our dues.

we deserved to have an awesome family night out.  it certainly didn't always work out that way in the past.

but live it up we did...
and the kids couldn't stop thanking us for it.

it was a great feeling and wonderful break
over their spring break.

it was well worth every later-than-bedtime-minute.
the kids are already asking when we can go back.

and so am i.

Thursday, April 8, 2010


This week is unbearable.
The weather is amazing.
The pollen is horrible.
The circus was awesome.
The heat kind of sucks.

I’m stuck at work.
My kids are home.
My husband is home.
My mind is home.

I am eagerly awaiting the arrival of my blog-niece-or-nephew, and I’m growing impatient.

I’m busy mentally putting together our outfits in preparation for our upcoming Blue Lily shoot.

I’ve been searching high and low all over the internet to find the perfect {and perfectly priced} decorations for Sophie’s big party. It is proving more difficult than I had imagined.

The biggest issue is my free time.
I have none.
Which means, a serious lack of blogging. {I was on such a roll.}

I have plans in my head, big awesome plans, for all the gardening I want to get done in the next couple of weeks. If I can’t find time to blog, how can I find time to GARDEN??

Wish me luck.


easter was all about the kids.  just because the adults were sick with worry didn't mean the kids should know about it.  we held a massive egg hunt for the kids {with over 225 eggs} and it was mighty fun to see these kids do their easter thang.
all the hamako grandkids {minus little jack and charlie} with
little winston on the far right {the sweet little neighbor}
my girls with their idol {miss mia}
we follwed up easter morning at my in-laws with easter afternoon at my sister's.
it was my beautiful nephew's 4th birthday.
it was an awesome afternoon.
ethan laughing because he just successfully put his whoopie cushion
under someone's booky.
aidan and his monster truck cake.
he was SO excited!
{i can't blame him.  the cake was awesome!}

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


I have been blessed in so many ways.

Yesterday was my eighth anniversary to my beau.

It wasn’t focused on us in the least.

{and we’re ok with that}

Eight years ago I was not only rewarded with a lifetime commitment from my husband, but I also got an amazing family as a bonus.

This weekend we received some devastating news about my father in law. It’s quite painful to think about.


Nine years ago I was dating this guy… he was so cute and good hearted and much older than I ever anticipated associating myself with (he was 30, I was 22). Best dimples ever and kindest heart to boot. I was smitten. Things weren’t always perfect, but we knew we wanted to work towards… forever.

Slightly after a year of dating I……. hmmmm…. got knocked up. We’ve always said that child was the reason we got married when we did, however, not the reason we got married. And to this day, I stand by that remark.

We told our families in different ways. None of which were easy. When we told Chris’ family I remember being at the dinner table. I made sure I was sitting one down and on the same side as his mother. I had no idea how she would take the news. But of course, as I predicted, she was uncomfortably shell-shocked. BUT UNDERSTANDABLY SO! I just wanted to make sure I didn’t have to sit and stare at that for the entire meal. It pained me and I truly couldn’t begin to imagine how that must have felt to her. And I didn’t try.

The one person that wasn’t at that meal was my father in law. He was on his way back from Chicago that night. We tried waiting for him to get there before spilling our news, but it didn’t seem like he would make it in time. We left shortly after dinner. On our way out of the neighborhood we passed his father. So, back to the house we went.

I had only met his father a few times in that year. I was completely nervous to relay this level of information to him. It was a big uncomfortable deal.

As he brought his bags into the house that night, we stood at the kitchen counter and told him. He was ecstatic. In fact, his words were… “It better be a girl!!”

Throughout these nine and a half years that man has loved me like his own daughter. I may not have produced a girl that first time, but he certainly got his wish not once, but twice after that! That’s how much I loved him. {and yes, I’m well aware that I had no real control over the sex of my children}

To say I’m sad about the unknown future goes without saying. My father in law is a wonderful man, a great grand-father to my children, and someone I really admire. He welcomed me into the family eight years ago as if I was his daughter by birth. I hurt for my entire family right now. Because if I can love this man this much, what about his own flesh and blood? I just can't imagine. And wouldn't you know, my hubby is sticking with the potential benign future that could lie ahead of us. Part of me worries about that, but part of me also knows someone always has to play that role.

But, to end on a somewhat lighter note...
{because that's how i roll}
This morning I woke up from a night of tears to...

Hold yer breath...


Yes, this Asian had eyelids.
Tears at night = eyelids on Asians.

I have to say... I looked so wierd.
I can't imagine having surgery to make this look permanent.
Crazy Asians.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

April Foolio.

my little ethan has always wanted a baby brother. 

{and ohhhhhhhhhh how i still long for that to happen, even though it's impossible.}

so flash-back to dinner after class the other night...

we took the kids downtown to have some italian cuisine and visit the italian market.

sitting at dinner my son, my first born, my sole son, my heart of hearts could not stop pulling April Fool jokes on us.  and the waitress.  and anyone who would listen.

i kind of had it.

so, i pulled one.  

"Ethan, you know how you've always wanted to have a brother?  Well, get ready, because you're going to get one!"

tears.  lots of them.  but they weren't happy tears like i thought they would be.  they were ANGRY tears.

i couldn't believe what i was seeing.  all these years of constantly begging and all of the sudden he's angry.

"April Fool's, although I now think I'm the worst mommy ever!"

Ethan wipes away his personal flood of emotions, looks at me and says, "Mommy, i know you want another baby so badly.  I'm going to give you grandbabies."

I said, "Well that's great E, but you have to wait until you're at LEAST 25, have gone through college, have a good job, and a place to live."

E says, "Noooooo problem!"

And how I forgot this one, I don't really know, but I said, "OH, and of course, you need a WIFE!"

E stops breathing.  "Um, sorry Mom, that's not gonna happen --- it's just gonna be me and a dog.  No women allowed."

of course.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

common bond.

today we went to school with chris.  the weather was absolutely amazing and i felt the pull of the outdoors tonight, suggesting i accompany my beau to class.  but not all the way to class.  just as far as the front door of his building.

this is our common bond.

this school.

i graduated eight years ago, with baby ethan all warm and cozy inside my womb.

if all goes right and as planned, chris will graduate in 2011. 

tonight, i sat in the grass and let the kids run free.  until i saw classroom windows open, at which point it turned into a much more stressful event than originally forecasted.  oh well.  right?

i loved it.
even though it consisted of two children in timeout for 25 mins a piece...
i loved it.
and i am pretty sure they did too.