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Monday, April 11, 2011

maybe {but not really}

children are amazing little things.  {expecially the ones in my life. but i'm not partial, or anything.}  they know how to take you by surprise at any given time using any given tools or means possible.  they say funny things.  they eat crazy things.  they do  a w e s o m e  things.

for the last eleven years i have had the pleasure of being an aunt to this girl {the one that made me love myself just a bit more}.  she stole my heart from the first time i laid my eyes on her.  her smile was always so rewarding to see.  her sweet voice always brought joy to my heart.  she was {and is} {and forever will be} my sweet baby niece.  i love her {with all my heart}.

color me shocked when i learned she would be traveling from california to virginia on her own with 24 hours notice just to spend her spring break with our extended family.  she is eleven.  ELEVEN, folks.  we are approximately 2,616 miles from her home and she got on a big-ass airplane by herself and flew across the mother-stinkin' country.

when i was eleven i was throwing rocks at cute boys.  my first trip across country?  at the ripe ole' age of twenty years old.  T W E N T Y, folks.  {color me pathetic.}

but she got here and had an exceptionally awesome week {says me!}... and now, she is home in the arms of those that made her.  and i miss her.  and i praise her.  and i just don't know if i could muster up the courage {as a mom} to send my own little birds across the country on their own one day.  i've got a few years before ethan starts begging, but i totally open-mouth-inserted-foot after we said our goodbyes, "yes ethan, when you are eleven perhaps we could do something as big as this!"

why do i say things like that just to get out of the moment?

oh.

to get out of the moment.

damn it.
 maybe he'll forget. 

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