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Saturday, February 26, 2011

for real, i'm not...


i am not alone.
nope.

i mean, i only posted three times in January, and now FOUR in february, but i am not alone.  even cjane gets writers block.  blogging is hard.

one of the differences between she and i (that sticks out of late, but no worries, i also realize there are about a million others)is that her writers block tends not to last as long as mine.  i contend that's because she has thousands of readers prodding, texting, FBing, emailing, and calling her with their concern, thus motivating her somewhat more quickly than i can motivate myself.  and on top of that, it gives her something else to blog about.

i die for cjane updates, but she's right -- we want more facetime with her.  guest bloggers are ok, but several times a week ... well... just make me think i should read their blogs.  

so as a consumer of blogs i have realized ... i need motivation to keep writing on here.  what used to motivate me now just confuses me... my kids lives are a mile a minute and i completely lack the ability to focus on the small things that make life so good.  those small things make me realize big things (like overall happiness in life), and thus, i tend not to blog nearly as much.  i become overwhelmed and confused about what sounds good or what my purpose is or how long i can honestly dedicate to writing an entry because to my left sits a list of a billion things to do on a daily basis.

blog guilt.  ugh.

i'm just letting you know this entire thing still weighs heavily on my mind.  i think of it constantly and i am trying to get back into a good rhythm in life that allows me to calm things down, yet fit everything in at the same time.

it's not impossible, just a creative work in progress.

but thank you, cjane.  your lack of facetime has made me realize the importance of my own facetime on here.  if not for my wonderful audience today, for the one twenty years from now that  share the same name as i.  hamako.  as in, my heavenlyhamakos.

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