2008. 2009.

and i say GOOD RIDDINS to 2008 as I wholeheartedly welcome 2009.

since i've been a grown-up i've never had a year that has brought such a huge amount of tears as 2008 did. i won't say they were all negative. {i did welcome two beautiful nieces this year, afterall, not to mention me falling in love all over again with my beau}... but the heartache and pain of a spouse losing his job during a falling economy at Christmas time is enough to make you cry yourself to sleep for weeks on end.
i am lucky to have a family that i not only love, but i LIKE. when you like people, you tend to talk to them more often and they have the ability to support you and provide that support on a more frequent basis. frequency. that is a huge part of keeping the up with the momentum of positive thinking and living. and for frequency, i am blessed.

i had a lot to learn this year, and most of it faced me head-on in just these last few months of the year. i had to learn patience. i had to learn i can't control everything in life. i had to learn how to turn lemons into lemonade. i had to learn how to slow down so i can smell the roses, versus seeing them out of my peripheral. those are lots of lessons to learn and live, but i'm proud to say, i've done it better than i thought i was capable of doing.

but as much as i've had one heckuva year, i know there are so many others out there that have had it much worse than me and my little family of 5. nienie, my sister-in-law's family... i could really go on and on. but i have begun learning from stories like nie's or the Masoudis' -- learning how to be a better mother to my children because some things are just so trivial when compared to things that CAN happen. because, lest we forget, we are not in control of this life. there is some awesome big guy upstairs that has a plan for each of us and even though i may think i am in control of this life, i am far, far from it. nie has taught me how cherish my children for what they are. children. they are children. they are not small adults... just children. glorious, beautiful, wondrous, proFOUND children. finding her blog was purely accidental on my part but it was completely intentional on the part of God. wow. would you look at that? some amazing woman in mesa that i have never met, seen, or heard of, literally lands right under my nose and on my laptop one day. and since that day, i have developed an understanding of what kind of a mother i want to be. one a lot like nie.

this year was the year i turned that dreadful 30 years of age. this year was the year my two year old decided she was going to be the girliest girly-girl on the face of this planet. this year was the year my son left me with the lasting "vegetarian" memory {he witnessed me and his father arguing about something and became very concerned... to the point of tears. we explained that sometimes people have different opinions and points of view about things... his response? "ooooooHHHHHHH...like being a vegetarrrrrrrriannnnnnnn."} .... and my five year old, well, wow. what can i say other than... she has proved herself as mommy's biggest helper, and one that doesn't complain when doing so. i can't even put a price on that.


i am so thankful for my three little peas that have the knack for making me laugh unexpectedly and unintentionally when i'm on the verge of tears. as painfully tiring as this job may be, the fruits of my labor(s) continue to prove their worth in silver, gold, and some diamonds, too.

my point in relaying some of the highlights of 2008 were so i can put the lowlights behind me. the low were low and in 2009 all i can hope for are better lowlights, more highlights, and better lives for people like the Nielsons and Masoudis who desperately deserve so.


and i have a promise for my little family of 5 for this new year... i promise to enjoy you. top to bottom. inside and out. you will be my lemonade, my roses, and forever my purpose.

POST EDIT: 7 NOV 09...

What a difference a year makes.  If only I had known.... 2009 blew 2008 out of the water, as far as bad years go.  You just never know and you should never speak too soon.  I will take this great wealth of knowledge from first hand experience into 2010 with me and can only HOPE I don't get too cocky with my "worst year ever" comments.  Focus on the positives.  Eliminate the negatives.  Latch onto the affirmatives, don't mess with Mr. In-Between.